Joe Lycett shares hilarious update after leaving his garden with a 'highly distressed' team while on tour

Joe Lycett has recently returned from an immensely successful tour of New Zealand and Australia. As well as adding a spontaneous extra show in Adelaide, the Brummie comedian, 34, turned the tour into a unique short film for fans to stream worldwide.

In 2019, Joe decided to become a gardener, frequently sharing comical updates of his hard work to Instagram. His 1.3 million Instagram followers were frothing at the mouths for another update, as there has been no news on Joe’s horticultural journey since 2022.

This Sunday (4th June) the Late Night Lycett presenter provided  12 pictures and descriptions of the garden’s progression during his time away. Posting to his Instagram story, Joe reassured fans, writing: “I’ve been in Australia and New Zealand but don’t worry!!! A team of highly distressed elderly men were bribed to preserve my patch until my return!!!” Building the anticipation for the long-awaited update, he added: “It’s an absolute SLUT A THON!!!!!!”

Although every post was both interesting and hilarious, some perfectly encapsulated the Travel Man presenter’s realistic and raw take on gardening. Overlaying a picture of a pink peony flower, Joe wrote: “Look at this stupid littler f***er. Peonies only flower for about 10 minutes and this daft b*****d has flowered INTO its own foliage. Last time I saw something this stupid I was watching the current government AM I RITE!!!!”

He revealed his ‘new fave’ plant from the garden is his Ceanothus, and cited an interesting reason for this choice: “Looks like the inside of your lungs if you’re chonging on a blueberry vape 24/7 WHICH I AM lol?!!”

In the greenhouse, some of Joe’s tomato plants looked less than happy after his time away, but he kept a positive attitude, writing: These are beefsteak tomatoes I bought online and I am VERY happy with them. You might say ‘but Joe they look completely f***ed’ but I actually ordered the ‘nearly or almost certainly dead’ variety so this is a success”.

He rounded off the update by writing “Here is a 3D scan I did of my garden on my phone because I’m so cool!”. Joe also encouraged fans to sign up to his mailing list for exclusive content.